Is your relationship bad for your health or heading into dangerous territory? Take this test and find out. If you answer yes to more than two of the categories, turn to someone for help.

Is he someone who . . .

• Is jealous and possessive toward you, won't let you have friends, checks up on you, won't accept breaking up?
  
• Tries to control you by being very bossy, giving orders, making all the decisions, doesnt take your opinion seriously?
  
• Is scary? Do you worry about how this person will react to things you say or do? Does this person threaten you, use or own weapons?
  
• Is violent? Does this person have a history of fighting, lose his temper, brag about mistreating others?
  
• Pressures you for sex, is forceful or scary about sex? Thinks that women or girls are sex objects, attempts to manipulate or guilt-trip you by saying, Ò If you really loved me, you would..., or gets too serious about the relationship too fast for comfort?
  
• Abuses drugs or alcohol and pressures you to take them?
  
• Blames you when you are mistreated? Says you provoked it?
  
• Has a history of bad relationships, and blames the other person for all the problems?
  
• Believes that men should be in control and powerful and that women should be passive and submissive?
  
• Has hit, pushed, choked, restrained, kicked or physically abused you?
  
• Makes your family and friends concerned about your safety?

 

SOURCE: Mount Auburn Hospital Prevention and Training Center in Waltham , (617) 893-0111, and the Dating Violence Intervention Project in Cambridge , (617) 868-8328.